Posted by: angelnorman | June 23, 2008

A false sense of security

Nick's false sense of security. 

Every night at bedtime, Nicholas makes us put a chair in front of his door from his side so that, as he says, “the dogs don’t come in my room!” Please ignore the bits of trash and dirt that you can see there on the carpet. I haven’t vacuumed in a couple of months because I’m just that awesome.

Truthfully it’s because I haven’t dusted. Why vacuum if you are going to dust afterwards? You’d just be stirring up the dust that would inevitably land right back onto your carpet, therefore your good intentions of vacuuming in the first place would be in vain. I say, don’t do a thing you’re going to have to re-do in a day or so. Hence why my house is rarely cleaned. But I digress.

I want to talk about a false sense of security. Just like Nick has his dog deterrant, I have employed several things around the house that make me feel safe, too, like tamper-resistant cabinetry “locks” which are really just hooks that you can easily push down to access the goods in the cabinetry. I am putting this in my “false sense of security” category because, as you may have guessed, they’re no longer working for us.

It’s a cheap piece of plastic that, with enough force, can easily be broken. And who better to dish out enough force than a soon-to-be preschooler with an agenda of mayhem and foolishness?

We’ve been having some issues with Nicholas getting up in the middle of the night and just doing whatever he pleases lately. On Thursday night, he was in our room at midnight, 2 am, and 4 am– trying to climb in our bed. Finally at 4am, Mike learned that he had probably not slept much because there was evidence that he’d been involved in soem very serious activity… He had opened the kitchen drawer, obtained the scissors, and cut some papers up– all unimportant papers but it was an act still dangerous and therefore punishable. He had pushed a chair into the kitchen to get whatever he pleased off the countertops, getting the Spray n’ Wash from the laundry room and spraying it all over the floor. He has also taken the 4 rolls of scotch tape I’d just bought last week and taped all of them together. It took me several minutes to work it out, too.

Friday night he did something very similar… except this time, he got a hold of my purse, got my mascara out, and painted the walls and the front door with it.

Short of locking him in his room, which I cannot do because I’m terrified I would have a reason to later regret that decision, I’m not sure what to do to stop this problem we’re having.

Tonight, or last night as it were, he blew through the suggestion of a security system on the cabinets, got out my blue spray bottle, and sprayed the remainder or my Mrs. Meyers All Purpose cleaner all over his hands. Or at least that’s what he claimed. We found no evidence other than the empty bottle. He’s fine, don’t worry, and I fully inspected him for signs of skin contact and ingestion, which he very adamantly denied– but I still have no idea what to do with him.

I have to cancel my doctor’s appointment this morning because I’m guessing my child didn’t sleep at all last night. See, I called it quits at 8 pm last night because I was just physically drained. According to Mike, who didn’t come to bed till midnight or later, Nick was up even then and hadn’t slept– only demanded more Toy Story then more A Bug’s Life then more milk. And if he was still awake at 3 am, when his little hand touched my foot which sent shivers down my spine before I remembered that I had a kid and it was probably him and not a ghost like I feared, then he probably didn’t slept at all between that time.

I finally got him to chill out and sleep by removing all the toys from his reach and sitting at his door to ensure that he kept his little butt in his bed. I ought to get him up at 5 am and do some sort of toddler boot camp all day, starting with jumping jacks and ending with scrubbing the bathroom floors, as punishment for his “I make my own rules” behavior.

I don’t really know what else to do. But I am going to start by finding a more secure child lock for all the cabinetry and the drawers.



  1. AHHH! That is so frustrating! (though i have to admit I chuckled a bit at the scotch tape and the thought of toddler boot camp)

    I wish I had some great advice to put here. But Nick has me stumped! I’ll get brainstorming….

    If only we could figure out how to put a force-field in his doorway…..

  2. wow, what a night! I must admit, I snickered a few times, mainly because I have been through a few of those things with Abby (the makeup on the walls and doors!) anyway, my only suggestion would be maybe a baby gate across his door? You could tell him it was to keep the dogs out of his room, but really it would be to keep him in! We had one that stretched and had a metal latch and Abby couldn’t get it open, maybe one like that. Good Luck!

  3. i swear coen and nick are the same child…coen gets up an d come to our room about 4 times a night…i threatened to get him a bed alarm like we use on confused old people who try and get out of bed….i might…i’ll get you one too…hehe

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