Posted by: angelnorman | July 22, 2008

This tastes like good.

In one short month, I’ll be sending my toddler off to “school” for the very first time, and in four little months, he’ll officially become a preschooler with his fourth birthday. I’m not real sure how I feel about any of this, though my feelings mean very little in regards to the inevitablity of the situation. I can’t stop him from growing up, after all. I just seem to choke over the number 4 whenever I think about how big he is, how old he’s getting, how excited he is to go to school, and how much he’s changed in the last year alone.

He is just growing too fast, that’s all there is to any of my doubts and worries. I’m not prepared to give up my baby yet, plain and simple. I am confident that this is why I’ve wanted a baby at all in the last year– because I just want someone smaller to focus on for awhile. This big boy stuff is a hard pill to swallow for this mommy because it means letting go of really great things like, well… having more than one chance to cuddle a day! Or him letting me choose his outfit! Or a day without his newfound sassiness. I just miss having someone depend on me for everything, I think. And now with sending him to school and him turning 4 shortly thereafter, it seems so much more permanent.

But on the other hand, I’m super proud of how far he’s come and how awesome he’s turned out to be as an independent, “I only need mommy if I fall and hurt myself or if I want to eat at all” boy. I still hate his relentless backtalking and how he calls everyone a “butthanger”– I’m really not sure where this comes from, though I blame my BFF for laughing at it and making this seem worthy of repeating. (Grrr! Let me just say that you better watch your back, missy, because what comes around, goes around and I will make sure to teach your kids EVERY THING you teach mine, and then some 🙂)  And I don’t much like it when he walks up to people and hikes his leg and says “pssssssss” like he’s peeing on them. I’m pretty sure I’ll have to talk to many a teacher because of this sort of behavior.

But at the same time, it all makes me smile. He’s got a wonderful personality, as weird and demented as it may be at times.

And he’s changing in other ways too. He’s suddenly very interested in the world around him.

Whenever I ask him these days about what he is going to learn at school, he holds up one hand and wiggles his fingers. I’ve learned that this means he intends to learn about counting. He is fascinated with learning things these days. He’s a very eager student. I’ve been working on tying shoestrings with him, and he’s been tying knots in practically everything. He’s also very into letters and he thinks any printed word we come across says his name. He’s also asking how to spell his name every time he has a pencil or crayon in his hand.

And he eats a lot more these days. I think he’s either in a growth spurt or he’s finally outgrowing his picky eater stage. He is always asking for something to eat though. I love this new behavior when it comes to eating because for so, so long I’ve had to deal with his pickiness- forcing snacks on him because I was afraid he wasn’t getting any nutrion out of his standard diet of all pb&j sandwiches all the time– and now, we can actually sit down and get through a meal where everyone eats at the same time. It’s awesome, actually. I thoroughly enjoy our much calmer mealtimes, and I also feel good knowing that he’s eating healthier meals… with the occasional pb&j sammy.

I ordered his lunchbox for school. We got him a pirate lunchbox that says his name from Cuddle Me Cozy. A friend of mine said the other day that some schools don’t allow characters at all, so I hope we’re able to use it. If not, there’s always the occasional picnic we can use it for! He is very excited to take it to school, though.

The only thing I’m looking forward to is having two days a week where I can actually do whatever I want, no holds barred. At least until 2 pm.

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Responses

  1. hey! I’m right there with ya girl!! I really felt saddened by Abby’s 4th bday, because it’s like what you said, they can get around and do so much without you! But on the other hand I was so glad because she’s getting bigger and smarter and so interesting every day! I have wondered the same thing about a baby, like maybe I’m just wanting another one because I miss Abby being a baby, I think I actually wrote that in my blog the other day! We are still waiting to find out if Abby will get in pre school! If she does and I hope she does, it will be starting, the whole going to school thing and growing up quicker than she has already! Aww, us poor Moms can cry together! PS Abby’s been very sassy and has finally started eating something other than pb&j, maybe it’s their age! I could do with less of the sassy and more of my sweet cuddly baby again!

  2. I almost cried today thinking about Emory growing up….now I understand why my mom cried when I left for college 🙂 I’ve been having second thoughts about the school thing, but I think I’m going to stick with it. Its so scary though!


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