Posted by: angelnorman | March 20, 2009

Facebook woes.

No longer in denial, I am here to admit that I am no longer anti-phone. In fact, I might even like it. You will need to know this if you want to continue being my friend.

Though I’ve always claimed that I’m not a phone person, I’ve recently come to accept the fact that maybe I do prefer it to other methods of communication. In the past few years, if you wanted to talk to me, you’d probably call and get my voicemail, then you’d email and Myspace comment me as well. I would surely see your attempt to reach me through the internet before I would get your message, no doubt. I avoided the phone at all costs, my low self esteem reassuring me that I was much too awkward on the phone and that writing- my art!- was the only way I could ever be eloquent, charming, more myself.

These days, however, if you want to reach me, I am here to tell you that the most effective method is telephoning. I’ve learned that I’m actually not so bad at talking to people as I once thought. Sure, I’m not eloquent or charismatic in every phone call, but I’m not terrible either. As long as I’m not napping when you call (I’m sorry, Jen, that I missed your call today!), I will answer and we will communicate!

So keep this in mind when I drop this next bomb on you…

I have no time for communication via the internets these days. I barely check my twitter, or facebook anymore, and Myspace is practically dead to me. Email is still okay. I just rarely respond to it because I’m a jerk. I only respond to things that are necessary to respond to. I know, right? Total ass.

Facebook is at the top of my “hate it” list. Though I’ve used it these last few days for some very important quiz-taking (I’m meant to live in Seattle and I was born to help people. These are things I might not know without the Facebook quizzes I took this morning.) and status-updating, I have neglected to acknowledge any invitations I’ve been getting from all the millions of applications my friends seem to love to use. I’ve read a few of my friend’s updates, the ones that showed in my news feeds, but I’ve not gone beyond that first page (mainly because I don’t know how.)

So imagine the dilemma I find myself in when I see this:

75 requests. 75 pressing things for me to acknowledge. And one invite to something or other. Also? An email from a WoW friend that I read when I was notified I had it, but mostly because I pasted the entire lyrics to “Breathe Again” by Toni Braxton in my email to this person and I wanted to see if they thought I was nuts. (They did, but in a good way.)

It’s too much for one girl to handle. It’s overwhelming to log on to something that is meant to keep you in touch with those closest to you- perhaps other anti-phone people who will only communicate through the internet- and see a bunch of requests that you have to deal with. It’s like… work. Work that you don’t get paid to do. I had to ignore the majority of them just to get down to a manageable number of requests.

Facebook is now as messy and chaotic to me as Myspace is. Yes, Facebook is still far superior to Myspace, the breeding ground of perverts and morons that it is, but I am starting to really hate it. I don’t care how many times they change it to make it better, stronger, faster. I’m just over it. There’s no reason for me to go on there except to see what my “friends” are doing– friends by the way, whom I only talk to online. What is wrong with this world we live in that we’re all so dependent on these things that just dumb down the way we communicate with one another? I’m so not impressed anymore, can you tell? 🙂

Were I not looking up WoW friends yesterday on Facebook, I probably wouldn’t have signed on at all. That’s the saddest part. There’s just nothing that makes me want to go online anymore except to occasionally look at my friends’ pictures. Outside of a few comments I got last week, I never get any real communication from my friends there anymore. It’s just invite after invite to this cause or that or a plant for a fictitious garden I can’t even  find the time to maintain. I’m not telling you this so you’ll comment me more or anything. I’m just saying I no longer feel the need to use it, I guess. I can’t remember why I ever liked it even.

I’ve been debating about whether or not to cancel my myspace page too. I mean, why keep it if I never use it except to listen to the bands of various family members?

I don’t know. I just feel like logging on to these so-called social networks is now too much hassle. Socializing should not be a job! It’s supposed to be natural and organic. You meet someone and have a face to face conversation. You call someone on a phone and you talk and hear one another’s voices. You can even email and read each other’s words, I guess! But socializing should not require weeding through and processing 75 requests at 5 AM, that’s for sure. o.O



  1. Ithanks to facebook quizzes I too found out that ’m meant to live in Seattle and I was born to help people! funny huh!

  2. I understand all that..but I hope you can atleast keep your facebook account for the first few years that we move away. That way we can keep connected with pictures and all that. I should call you..I don’t bug you enough. LOLOL. 🙂 Love, your phone stalker

  3. oh good, so if i call you now you might actually call back? wow. now if only i had not become a phone phobic in the meantime.

    i ignore those “requests” on facebook and ONLY use it for networking and talking to people… real people. almost everyone on my friends list on facebook is someone i know in real life. i love connecting with so many people that way. there is no way that i’d keep in touch with cousins and old high school pals without it. there is not enough time to connect with my closest friends much less all six hundred people on my friends list without the internet.

    that said, i want to cancel my myspace account too. it sucks. it’s pointless and a waste of time. only reason i keep the account is because i am one of the first people on myspace. ack, i dunno if i want to lose my place!

  4. i only look at my own page – how egotistical is that? and I ignore all those requests too. total waste of time. and I’m pretty sure i want to cancel myspace too, and the only reason I haven’t is for fear of losing contact with Stacy H!

  5. I just always click ‘ignore all’.

  6. I’m with Ems – I just ignore the requests and look at my own page. Like once every few days.
    There is no excuse for not answering e-mails though, jerk. I’m glad you’ve “evolved” to spending your time on the phone, but I still rely on e-mails so I can communicate with the outside world at their convenience and mine. And mine is usually at 3am, sucka, so answer my friggin emails. (Really though, phone people – you all just feel obligated to mindless chatter because you’re on the phone. If you stuck to e-mail and face-to-face contact you’d communicate much more effectively.)
    And by the way – following a post about how you prefer to socialize via online gaming with a post about how you’re so anti online social networks is hilarious, my little walking contradiction.

  7. Charlene- I kind of like the quizzes, don’t you? I always sort of knew I belonged on the pacific coast. I am always drawn to the west when I think about running away and starting a new life somewhere else 🙂

    Jen- Your calls are always welcome. 🙂 And yes, I’ll keep the facebook page!

    Mandy: Figures that we missed each other and switched places, eh? Why can’t we ever be on the same page?! Haha. I have a lot of history on myspace too, as well as friends who haven’t made the switch to FB.
    I’d miss that, a little maybe. But yeah, it’s just something else to check. I can’t keep up with everyone!

    Ems- I hear ya. Stacy R you mean? I am not aware of a Stacy H. Anyways, guess what? I added her as a friend on FB just the other day…

    Dusty: I need to do this, but some things are actually interesting. They’re few and far between but I wouldnt want to just rule out everyone’s stuff. Or maybe I do. I don’t really know.

    Ashlee: 😛 I only answer emails when I have something to say. Sorry! I know I suck. Also, I hear what you are saying about the email thing being convenient not just for you but for others being that your free time is often not at the same time as their free time. I get that. But I don’t think what I have in my phone calls is “mindless chatter” nor do I feel I am ineffectively communicating. At least on the phone I can convey emotion without using smilies or something else, you know? That thrills me as smilies are the devil and anytime I don’t follow my sarcasm with smilies in my blogs or emails, people are inevitibly offended.

    Also I feel I should explain myself since I’m been called a walking contradiction regarding my two seemingly bipolar takes on my social life. My post about WoW was all in jest, I was pretty sure I made that clear. This post about Facebook isn’t about how Myspace or Facebook suck at being a social network or how the people who use them are pathetic, so I apologize if I’ve offended anyone. I’m simply complaining, at 5 am mind you so don’t expect wonderful blogging, about how the applications and the obligatory checking sucks.

    When I said, “What is wrong with this world we live in that we’re all so dependent on these things that just dumb down the way we communicate with one another?”, I was merely stating that these particular networks we’re all using daily are really not helping us communicate. What I did not make clear was that I meant this in regard to what I complain about in the rest of the blog- the applications, the quizzes, the “fake” socializing. I thought I made my point nearer to the end of the blog when I said, “Outside of a few comments I got last week, I never get any real communication from my friends there anymore. It’s just invite after invite to this cause or that or a plant for a fictitious garden I can’t even find the time to maintain.” I was simply expressing discontent with that fake connection. I am fine with comments! I love talking to my aunts and cousins and friends on there! So just so we’re clear… I’m saying that comments, photos, and emails through facebook= real communication. Applications where people send me 4 leaf clovers: not real cmmunication.

    Also, honestly? I wouldn’t trade my relationships in WoW, no matter how deep they go, for anything. I don’t think of WoW as fake communication really. Again, that was a sarcastic blog about how I’ve been blowing off real-life friends for what, to the outside world, probably doesn’t look all that important. Haha. I talk to people via Ventrilo, so I hear voices and laughter when I socialize with my gaming buddies much like on Xbox Live or whatnot. It’s totally a real relationship, if only for a video game. I enjoy these game friends and the time I spend with them very much. ❤

    So I hope we're clear that I didn't mean to offend anyone or seem like I was contradicting myself. To all my readers: You do as you please, I'll do as I please. I won't judge you, and I'll ask that you don't judge me either. 😀

  8. Oh darn. I should have included a smiley so you’d have known I was being sarcastic.

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