Posted by: angelnorman | July 17, 2009

strange condition.

I smoked some cigarettes and begged the best friend to not tell him-
the best friend who is now a fan of cigarettes! What the heck?-
Because I was pretty sure that if he’d thought I’d gone back to my ciggies,
He’d not like me so much for it.
So I hid my secret until our shower this afternoon
(Yes, we take showers together, as often as possible actually.)
And then I confessed.
Because I don’t like secrets if he’s not in on them.
“So don’t get mad, but I smoked last night.”
He rinsed his hair and said nothing but,
“Smoked what?”
And right in that moment, with that question,
(because I wasn’t aware there was a question of what I might smoke!)
I remembered
How much I love him so.
(He didn’t even try to make me feel bad.)

***

Thoughts from last night:
– What the hell happened to Nashville? I am so glad I was young when I was, because if I was an 18 year old now, I would be PISSED that there is no real nightlife in that town. Michelle and I, when we were in our prime, had no trouble finding anything to do back in the day. There was more than one coffeehouse opened past 11 then. There were bars that weren’t scary. There were people everywhere and it was fascinating. Now it’s just tired and sad.

– I really, really, really enjoy concerts. I shouldn’t have stopped going to them. Why do I always feel so weird about them now? It’s like, if it’s not someone huge, I can never justify the hassle versus the entertainment possibility, if that makes sense. Like, I am not usually inclined to get a sitter and go to some lower key concert at Exit/In or Mercy Lounge, because I feel I’m less entitled to it than say, if it were some major headlining act at a major venue. Does that make sense? Maybe not, but that’s not the point anyways. The point is that I like concerts, dang it, and I’m going to go to more of them. August 24th, Exit/In, 9pm. I’ll be there, brosef.

– I kind of miss smoking. That’s really bad, I know. I shouldn’t have smoked last night. BUT… it was only 4 ciggies, and that’s not THAT bad. I could always be one of those cool kids who smokes when she drinks, right? Since I rarely drink, that’d be okay. (Alright, that wouldn’t be okay either, but I’m trying to make myself feel less guilty for breaking my “five years and nicotine free” streak. Mainly, I was floored at Michelle for asking me to smoke in the first place and it was that shock factor that made it so appealing. I hope that really doesn’t become an issue for her. Or for me, haha.

– Michelob Ultra is not bad. If I have to drink a beer, I choose something less hoppy-flavored like that. Yes, I am pretty sure that’s a technical term. Amstel Light is a no-no though.

– Zee Avi rocks my face. She’s hawt, and if I had to choose a girl to crush on, I’m choosing her. I ❤ her music.

– Pete Yorn looks better all scruffy and bearded. I am terribly biased to beards now. I don’t even like when Mike trims his anymore. Any way he chooses to look though is okay by me- and that’s true for both Pete Yorn and my sweet Michael.

– Cafe Coco is not as bad as I remember it, and I actually preferred their coffee. White Satin FTW. Also? People were smoking hookahs there and I was having a blast people-watching, thanks very much.

– The only thing that sucked about last night? The absence of my guy who still sees me as that 17 year old girl he fell in love with, no matter how old and frumpy I oft feel. Thank you sweet husband for letting me be, well… ME.

Photo: Pete Yorn, Cannery Ballroom, Nashville, TN. 7/16/09

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Responses

  1. I think I may be slightly obsessed by your blogs now. TOO FUNNY! Smoked what? hahaha Cute.


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