Posted by: angelnorman | October 1, 2009

what are best friends good for?

That's what.

Well, for starters, they inspire you to finish projects by calling you and cheering you on, then packing up some paint clothes, driving an hour intent on staying overnight just so they can be here first thing in the morning to help you start painting.  That’s what best friends are good for.

The walls? Yes, they will be finished. That was a Valspar paint sample– you know those little cans they sell so you can smother your walls with the color to see if it’s something you can live with? Yes, that’s the reason for that part looking a little unfinished. There was enough in the little paint sample to do all of that PLUS slap some in the dining room so I could see the golden shade in the sunlight. I love it. I love nothing more than turning the corner to go into my kitchen now. It’s exactly how I’ve always wanted it. Well… I’d prefer it to be finished, but you know what I mean.

Michelle is leaving me (… and the rest of her friends but who cares about them? Can’t I be a little selfish in my own blog?) My bestest friend in the whole world and she’s up and moving to another state. This has happened once in our 14 year friendship, when she moved to Atlanta for school, but that didn’t feel permanent then and this? Totally does. It’s so unfair. I can’t catch a break you know. As soon as I start wanting to work on my other issues and pull myself up by the bootstraps and all that jazz, the rain comes down on me again with yet another issue. Did you guys have any idea how reliant I am on Michelle? She is my rock. She understands perfectly when I go through anything, even things she’s never felt before like miscarriages or marital issues. She always listens and always offers the perfect balance of objective criticism with advice and compliments. “Angel, you are just sensitive. You feel things. You’re empathetic! That’s how you work!” she’ll say when I complain about how emo I’m feeling or whatever.

She loves me like a sister (as I love her) and she treats my kid as though he’s her nephew as opposed to her friend’s kid. Actually no. She treats Nick like he’s hers. And Nick? Totally adores her, actually. In fact, he refers to her as “my Michelle”. As far as he’s concerned, she only visits to hang out with him. She is at every birthday, at every milestone. She loves him with her whole heart– not halfway, but unconditionally as if he were her own. In her eyes, the kid does NO wrong.

She gets along with my husband, my parents, my siblings, my other friends. She never makes a demand on anyone, especially me. She never ever asks me to shutup so she can whine for awhile.

I’ve been totally selfish with her. I’ve wasted so much of our time together in the last few weeks whining and complaining about my issues. Okay, well, those were valid issues, I mean, I did miscarry. I did have my hopes dashed and my heart broken. I did falter in my faith- as I am still doing every day because I am human. But I just wish I had more time with her now, before she leaves. More time to just hang out without a purpose.

I told her yesterday morning I no longer wanted to paint. She had just learned she needed to be in Chicago by October 21st, and I was thinking I should do something other than paint my kitchen with her before she left me for a while. She insisted we go ahead and paint. “Angel,” she said to me. “we should really paint! Then we can say that was something we did together before I left- painted your kitchen.”

And I never had painted with her, so I figured why not? Too broke to do much else.

I couldn’t be more pleased with the results. I am so happy with the way the kitchen is going to look when all is said and done that I could squeal. And now it’s obvious to me that really? The kitchen, like so many other things, will be like having a little bit of her there… her touch on my home. And maybe that will be enough to help me overlook for awhile the touch she’s placed on my heart (at least until it’s a little less broken).

***

P.S. What other friend would not hinder Mike and I from our nightly reading, and instead, join in? I mean, instead of expecting us to wait till she went home to read, she decided to let us read aloud to her– and it wasn’t even weird at all to have an audience in our intimate setting like that. It was awesome, actually. (Of course, I think it was meant to be because somehow magically we- Mike and I- were on the same spot she left off the last time she had read Breaking Dawn on her own! There are no coincidences, people!) It was hilariously fun, and… to make it all so much more fun… she called us last night and we read for three hours to her on speaker phone. Oh thank God for telephones, because I will go crazy without being easily connected to her that way. ❤

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Responses

  1. I am here for you too. You could have ask me to help you paint!I will miss Michelle too. We have to hang out some time. I am sorry to hear you had i miscarriages. Call me sometime and i can come up to see you and Nick.

  2. I love the color and you will always remember the time spent in the kitchen with Michelle. Last week/end I went on a trip with my bestest girl-friend Linda. We met in the 10th grade at Hume-Fogg. We were pregnant at the same time with David and her daughter Tracey. We raised our kids together, partied together, divorced together,met #2 husband together and then lost touch with each other for 15yrs after I moved to Lebanon. A year and half ago she called about our 40th (ugh) high school reunion and her we are again. Both grand-mothers, and loving every minute of it. A true friendship will never end,no matter how many miles there are between you. Your heart and soul will always be connected. Love you

  3. It sounds so simple, but is really kind of cool that when your kitchen looks all awesome. but you are missing michelle, you can look at it fondly and think of her.

    I’m kinda sad i didn’t hang out with her more too……We should have a party, mostly because i really want to finally have the chance to dedicate Guns N Roses’ “My Michelle’ to someone.

  4. oh and p.s. love the colors!!!!!


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