Posted by: angelnorman | January 24, 2011

#785

you’re going to think i’m crazy, but i already want to repaint my kitchen, dining, and living rooms. i am getting increasingly bothered by staring at the walls. they still don’t evoke that sense of cohesive warmth that i was looking for,and i’m thinking a nice neutral, like a toasted almond color– warm, but beige and boring– would do the trick. then i could more easily change out my colors whenever i pleased. that would make me happy.

of course this is where mike might interject and say that i am never happy. and okay, sometimes that might seem true. beige paint isn’t going to make me happy, he’d tell you. but i don’t know… in this case, he might be wrong.

maybe.

i would be thrilled with this latest yearning (i love to paint), but when i think about how it’d be three rooms plus a hallway, i feel sick to my stomach.

or maybe that’s just the milk i had this morning giving me gas. (seriously. me+milk=very bad smells.)

but first before i go getting all “time to change up the look of the house!”, i need to clean. this also makes me sick to my stomach. i have a to-do list a mile long where i’ve, um, sort of let things go a bit around here. my toilets haven’t been cleaned in a week, same for my floors. my kitchen sink is overflowing with dishes even though i just did a load last night… my countertops are screaming for some pine sol-lovin’. and my laundry is taking over my bedroom.

my beloved was-clean-for-about-a-week bedroom.

and then there’s the appointments. i need to schedule myself and nick for about 5 different appointments (only one of those is his, ha.) then i need to wrap presents for some birthday parties this weekend. i need to run to the store, i need to pick up my prescriptions, and i need to replace some lightbulbs that have burnt completely out and have been out for, let’s see, about two weeks now.

i seriously lack discipline, i know. you don’t have to tell me. this is one of the many reasons i get so angry at myself. i wait and wait to do things and then, what do you know? my to-do list grows and grows and snowballs out of control, and then i’m sitting at my desk one more surrounded by filth and thinking, “man, i should do something”, but doing something seems so overwhelming!

breathe.

yesterday at church, the sermon was on giving your best to God (colossians 3, verses 15-whatever), and of course, colossians 3:17 was read. it is my favorite verse. “And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” for me, it’s a gentle reminder that all my jobs, even the ones i hate, i need to be doing cheerfully. i need to be proud of the work i put into things, whether i get thanked on this earth or not, for God will reward me for doing my best at even my most menial chores. God will most likely not say to me, “Oh, Angel, congratulations on vacuuming your house regularly. Here’s a mansion.” No. We know that works do not get us to heaven… and certainly not vacuuming. but because i am a stay-at-home mom, because i’ve chosen this path for my life- the path of the housewife- i am expected by my Father to do my best. God doesn’t care if my house is clean or not, but He does care if i slack when He Himself knows that i can do better. He doesn’t approve of lazy attitudes. He wants us to give things our all– because although we should be obedient only to Him, we are responsible for and to so many people on this earth. i am responsible for Nick and this house and the overflowing baskets of laundry. i am responsible to my husband. it is my duty to make sure things are in order… and God smiles upon us when we do what we’re supposed to do, even if we think it sucks. He approves of the tiniest thing being done cheerfully and for His glory.

now i’m not saying that me having a cleaner house brings glory to Him. i’m simply saying that as a christian, i have to try my best to be my best for God. and part of that is doing what i’m supposed to do while on this earth.

i hope that makes sense. remember, i had dairy this morning. my lactose-intake might be affecting more than just my digestive system.

okay. enough procrastinating. on to getting smiles from God.

 

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